North Korea, Best Korea!
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
