singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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