So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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