You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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