Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
