Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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