That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
