I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
