So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize
