they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
