we're blogging at a bar
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize