She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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