Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
she woke up with a sticky ear
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
