Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
