I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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