If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
