dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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