I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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