Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
