yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
