Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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