why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
