why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
