You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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