Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
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