this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
