he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
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