even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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