I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
