Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize