There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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