she was so not down for the gang bang
honey bunches of taint.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
