I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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