Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
