dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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