READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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