As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I have aggressive nipples.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
