think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
