Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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