She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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