PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
