She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Randomize
