Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
