i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
what is it with giant penises always finding me
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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