And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
