Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
