Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize