you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
