I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
