I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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